How do you recognise a good manager?

Name a specific thing they did. Managers receive more general praise than almost anyone and less specific feedback than most, which leaves them with very little information about which behaviours are working.

Is it appropriate to recognise your own manager?

Yes, and it is unusual enough to land hard. Upward recognition is rare because it can feel like currying favour, but a specific observation about one incident reads as feedback rather than flattery.

What management work goes unnoticed?

Shielding and filtering. Absorbing pressure from above, deciding what noise the team does not need, and taking blame that was not entirely theirs are all done quietly and mostly assumed to be invisible.

Should you recognise a manager for difficult feedback?

It is one of the most useful things you can do. Giving accurate criticism is uncomfortable and almost never thanked, which is a large part of why so many managers avoid it.

When is the wrong time to say it?

In an exit interview. Praise that arrives as somebody is leaving is the most common form and the least actionable, since neither of you can do anything with it.

Recognition messages

Recognising Good Leadership: 10 Message Examples

Managers are thanked in generalities more than almost anyone, which means they get very little information about what is working.

Managers get generalities

“Great manager.” “Really supportive.” “Best boss I have had.”

All sincere, all interchangeable, and none of it tells the person which of the hundred things they do each week is the one that is working. Managers are simultaneously the most-praised and least-informed people in most organisations.

Name the incident

The message a manager remembers describes a moment. A review where they took blame that was not theirs. An argument they lost in public and conceded. A deadline they refused upstairs.

Those are repeatable. A compliment about their character is not.

10 messages you can send

Thank you for taking the blame in that review. It was not entirely yours and everybody in the room knew it.
Report, on cover
Names something people notice and rarely mention.
You changed your mind in front of the team when Nour made the better argument. That did more for how we work than any process.
Peer manager, on modelling
One incident with a lasting effect.
Thanks for telling me the feedback directly instead of waiting for the review. It was easier to fix in March than it would have been in December.
Report, on timeliness
Specific about why the timing mattered.
You protected the team from the reorg noise for six weeks and then told us everything at once when it was actually decided. That was the right call.
Report, on filtering
Credits a judgement that could have gone badly.
Thank you for saying no to the deadline. I know what that cost you upstairs.
Report, on shielding
Acknowledges a cost the writer only half sees.
You give feedback that is specific enough to act on, which sounds like the minimum and is apparently rare.
Report, dry
A compliment shaped as a complaint about everyone else.
Thanks for backing the decision after arguing against it. The team never knew you disagreed until you told them yourself.
Peer manager, on commitment
Describes disagree-and-commit without the jargon.
You noticed I was heading for burnout before I did and you did something about it rather than mentioning it.
Report, on action
The distinction between noticing and acting.
Thank you for the one-to-ones you never cancelled. Two years, and I think you moved three of them.
Report, on reliability
A number that proves the point.
You hired someone better than you at the thing you are known for. Not many people do that.
Peer manager, on hiring
Recognises a decision requiring some ego.

What makes one land

Describe an incident, not a quality. “You are a great manager” gives them nothing to repeat; “you changed your mind in front of the team” does.
Tell them about the shielding you noticed. Managers absorb pressure quietly and mostly assume nobody sees it.
Recognise the feedback that was hard to give. Managers get thanked for support constantly and for accurate criticism almost never.
Say it upward and sideways. A manager’s peers and their own manager rarely hear what their team thinks, and that is where it is most useful.
Do not save it for when you leave. Exit-interview praise is the most common and least useful kind.

Questions people ask

How do you recognise a good manager?: Name a specific thing they did. Managers receive more general praise than almost anyone and less specific feedback than most, which leaves them with very little information about which behaviours are working.
Is it appropriate to recognise your own manager?: Yes, and it is unusual enough to land hard. Upward recognition is rare because it can feel like currying favour, but a specific observation about one incident reads as feedback rather than flattery.
What management work goes unnoticed?: Shielding and filtering. Absorbing pressure from above, deciding what noise the team does not need, and taking blame that was not entirely theirs are all done quietly and mostly assumed to be invisible.
Should you recognise a manager for difficult feedback?: It is one of the most useful things you can do. Giving accurate criticism is uncomfortable and almost never thanked, which is a large part of why so many managers avoid it.
When is the wrong time to say it?: In an exit interview. Praise that arrives as somebody is leaving is the most common form and the least actionable, since neither of you can do anything with it.